They've been used for a long time by sexuality educators, sex therapists, communities, couples and individuals, and they can be seriously useful tools. Yes, No and Maybe lists aren't something we invented. We might also sometimes find ourselves feeling inclined to only say what we think a partner wants to hear, or only responding to what they bring up rather than putting our own stuff on the table and initiating our own questions. It can feel like being asked what you want to eat at a restaurant without having a menu to even know your options. When sex is newer to us, we may not even have a sense of all there is to talk about. It might be particularly tough to start these conversations if talking about sex openly and out loud is something you've never done. Someone might ask what you do or don't like, or what may or may not be okay with you, and you may find you - or a partner, when they're asked - have a hard time knowing how to respond. Starting deep and honest communication about sex can be daunting, especially in areas which can be more loaded, tricky or where we feel vulnerable. We can't just know or guess what we or others want or need, like or dislike, are or are not okay with: we need to communicate those things and have them communicated to us. It's the best way to assure everyone is fully and freely consenting and physically and emotionally safe to help sex and sexual relationships be as satisfying, positive and awesome as they can be. * Sounding ::: The practice of inserting something into the urethra, predominately on male genitalia.Clear, truthful and open communication is a must with partnered sex. Also includes body-swapping and similar concepts. * Transformation ::: The fantasy or ritual about a character starting off as one person, but ending as another. * Futanari ::: The concept of fully female characters having, often engorged, male genitalia. * Necrophilia ::: The simulated concept of a deceased participant. * Ageplay ::: Acting much younger or older than your actual age to furfil a fantasy scenario. * Incest ::: The simulated fantasy of having relations with siblings, daughter/son to parent or similar structures. * Glory hole ::: The ritual of isolating a person from others, using holes in the wall as the only link between the two. * Magic wands ::: Much like vibrators, a magic wand delivers a strong vibration to a larger area with stronger force. * Vibrators ::: Phallic shaped devices with internal vibration. * Sensory deprivation ::: Covering both ears and eyes completely, often using noise-reduction tech to emphasise the feeling of isolation. A cage, full rope harness, ducttape, restricting the person to absolute minimal movement. * Encasement ::: Full encagement often means full movement restriction. * Stockades ::: Freestanding rigs that restricts the head, and often arms or legs too. * Cufflings ::: Wrapped around wrists and often ancles too, cufflings have little restrictions themselves, but using hooks and rope, they often makes it easier for the master to restrict the wearer spontaniously. Makes the wearer unable to grab or hold objects with their fingers. * Mitts ::: Cloth, leather or metal tools where you place your hands inside, often closed in a fist. * Leash ::: A leash is the rope between the wearer (often tied to a collar) and the master. * Gag ::: A rubber or plastic ornament placed in the mouth of the wearer, making them unable to speak. * Edging ::: The act of bringing the partner very close to orgasm, but giving the genitalia time to cool down, and then repeating the process. * Facials ::: The act of ejaculating directly on the face of the partner. * Handjobs / fingering ::: Stimulating the genitalia of the partner using mainly just hands. * Sleepover ::: Staying with your sexual partner overnight. * Using real names ::: Referring to the partner using real names, instead of pet or nicknames. * Spooning ::: Holding the partner close, often back to chest, and embracing them from behind. Hickies are listed under the light pain category.
* Kissing (body) ::: Planting kisses on various bodyparts.